MISCELLANIA
- Can you imagine approaching an attractive woman on the street and saying, "Tell you what. Why don't you remove all of your clothes except for a thong and 4-inch heels, then writhe and prance in front of me to the rhythms of bad '90s prom music? Oh, and you have to rub your breasts on my face and smile as though you're enjoying it more than a shoe-shopping spree on Rodeo Drive. If you do all this, I will give you one American dollar." Yet that's the standard deal in strip clubs. Amazing.
- A lot of people think there's a cleaning product called Murphy's Oil Soap. There isn't. It's Murphy Oil Soap -- no apostrophe, no "s".
- Suppose that I'm at SuperTarget, looking for a checkout lane, when I notice that one of the checkout girls is very attractive. You might think that my best choice, for staring and ogling purposes, is to go through her lane. But I've noticed when I do this, I'm only able to enjoy limited staring and ogling -- you can only stare and ogle so much when a girl is standing two feet away. My recent experiments have shown that by choosing the lane just to the right of the attractive checkout girl, I can stare and ogle with near impunity. True, the attractive checkout girl is a few feet farther away, but I think the large gain in staring-and-ogling quantity more than compensates for the slight loss in quality.
- While reading the September 2004 issue of Runner's World, I noticed an item that referred to a marathon as 1,660,032 inches in length. "That doesn't look right," I thought, and it wasn't -- a marathon is closer to 1,661,220.4 inches in length. The error was due to the common erroneous belief that a marathon is exactly 26.2 miles, when in fact a marathon is exactly 42.195 kilometers (approximately 26 miles plus 385 yards, or about 26.21876 miles).
Perhaps this is unrelated, but my eHarmony personality profile notes that I have "a strong need to be precise."
- MOVIE STUFF:
- In the climactic scene of Reservoir Dogs, Joe has his gun pointed at Mr. Orange, Mr. White is aiming at Joe, and Nice Guy Eddie has his gun pointed at Mr. White. Then everybody fires, and two seconds later, Joe and Eddie are dead and Mr. White is mortally wounded. But who shot whom, and in what order? I ran the scene back in slow motion, and this is the best I can figure it out:
- Joe shoots first, hitting Mr. Orange.
- Mr. White fires next, killing Joe.
- Eddie fires, missing Mr. White. Strangely enough, he starts to recoil and collapse at this point as though he's been shot, even though nobody has fired at him.
- Eddie fires again, hitting Mr. White.
- As he falls, Mr. White shoots and kills Eddie.
Can anyone corroborate this? I only have the movie on VHS, and the slo-mo playback is pretty grainy.
- While watching the dreadful Jerry Bruckheimer movie Pearl Harbor, I noticed that during the scene in which Ben Affleck battles German pilots, he shouts to an Allied pilot, "Nice shot, Red Two!"
"Hey," I thought, "that sounds like Star Wars."
Right I was. During the final battle of Return of the Jedi, a Rebel pilot shoots down an Imperial pilot outside the second Death Star. A fellow Rebel pilot shouts, "Nice shot, Red Two!"
That's right -- Jerry Bruckheimer included a Star Wars reference in a movie about Pearl Harbor. Well, heck, a little lack of respect never killed anyone, I guess. I hope that when this guy gets around to making a blockbuster special effects spectacular about 9/11, he doesn't forget to include a guy in one of the Twin Towers, watching in horror as a plane flies toward his building, and then taking a bite out of a carrot and saying, "What's up, Doc?"
- Does anyone agree that in the Matt Dillon-Neve Campbell-Denise Richards-Bill Murray-Kevin Bacon thriller Wild Things, the hottest girl by a wide margin is Denise Richards' friend, played by who-dat Toi Svane?
+posted by Lawrence @ 2/14/2005 11:19:00 AM
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