I cleaned out the cupboards this last weekend and found, in the back, behind the vinegar, a box of Arm & Hammer baking soda and a tin of Clabber Girl baking powder. Both containers were nearly full, because the only time I use them is when I bake cookies maybe twice a year.

What struck me is that I have bought baking soda and baking powder perhaps half a dozen times in my life -- usually when I move, because I never actually use the stuff up -- and I have never purchased any other brands. Even when I was a kid helping my mom decorate Christmas cookies, the baking soda and baking powder were always Clabber Girl and Arm & Hammer. I've never even noticed any other brands for sale; I guess they got driven to bankruptcy by Clabber Girl's and Arm & Hammer's ruthless price-cutting and dog-eat-dog monopolistic tactics. I can picture the Clabber Girl boss at Clabber Girl headquarters, fat and bloated like in a Thomas Nast cartoon, laughing maniacally as he stares out the the window, surveying his mighty baking soda empire.

Do you think Clabber Girl makes baking soda, and Arm & Hammer makes baking powder? That would be weird if they did. I would buy some, just because it would be so weird.

+posted by Lawrence @ 8/26/2003 12:15:00 AM